C-Section Birth Stories: Kimberly Roe

1. Please share the circumstances that led to your c-section birth(s):

Leading up to the birth of our second child, I had never really considered that I might have to have a c-section. As my due date inched closer, everything seemed to be a “go” for a vaginal delivery and so I assumed that my second delivery would be similar to my first. I had planned to once again try to go as long as I could without an epidural since ultimately I would love to have an unmedicated delivery at some point. However, I was open to getting it at the end if I really needed it as I did with the birth of my first. On the day that my daughter was born, I started having contractions around 3:00 am. Contractions were around 5-10 minutes apart. By 7:00 am, they stopped and I went about my normal morning. I was exhausted all morning so when my toddler went down for a nap, I went ahead and laid down with him. I was almost asleep when I was woken by a popping sound and sensation. After going to the bathroom and confirming my water had broken, I called my husband to come home from work so we could drop our son at my in-laws and head to the hospital.

Once at the hospital, they did a test to be sure my water had broken and told me I was at 3-4 centimeters. My contractions were slowly starting to ramp up and my OB stopped by to tell me that she wasn’t on call that night but that I was in the capable hands of another doctor in the practice who had actually delivered her babies. I started walking the halls to try and help speed things along and as soon as I got moved from triage into my delivery room, I spent some time in the tub. I had to get out of the tub and get into bed to be monitored for a while (per hospital policy) and so my labor nurse decided to check my progress. She spent a lot of time trying to figure out how dilated I was and eventually said she couldn’t figure it out. Meanwhile, my contractions continued to get more intense and closer together until it came to a point where I had no break in between them at all. Different nurses kept coming in to check me and I kept asking where I was as I started feeling the need to push but no one would give me a straight answer on if was time or not. At this point, while in extreme pain, I started to realize something was wrong and started to break down. After saying some choice words to my husband, I asked for an epidural.

The epidural helped, but I still couldn’t relax and different nurses continued coming in to check my progress. Finally, the charge nurse came and told us that they thought the baby was making a facial presentation and that sometimes that requires a c-section but we would just have to see when the OB arrived. As soon as she arrived, she checked me and said that she could feel what the nurses were feeling but thought that since it wasn’t my "first rodeo” that she could help navigate our baby out. I started pushing and after a few pushes she brought in the delivery team. It was after one more push that the OB shouted the most terrifying thing I could ever imagine a doctor shouting while watching your baby come out of you as she said, “Stop!!!!! What is that?!” and took a second to look closer. She then stated, “That is labia! This baby is breech. We have to do a c-section now.” Within minutes I was whisked off to the operating room for a very unexpected c-section.

2. What surprised you the most about having a c-section?:

I was most surprised by how hard it was to recover from my c-section, physically and emotionally. After my c-section, I could barely even get out of bed, and walking a lap around the hospital was incredibly taxing. As a marathon runner and a very active person, this was really hard for me. I also didn’t realize how much I would struggle with the emotional aspect. It felt incredibly wrong to have my daughter taken from my body and I couldn’t even look at my scar or talk about my c-section without starting to cry. It took some time to heal my body, my mind, and my spirit.

3. What kind of support do you feel you received (from friends, family, healthcare team) after your c-section(s)?:

After my c-section, my husband really stood up and took care of me and our kids. He did everything for all of us and really pulled me through my recovery. Other c-section moms really reached out and supported me. One of my former coworkers brought us a meal after learning that I had a c-section because she said she knew how tough it was to try to recover from major abdominal surgery with a toddler at home. My sister-in-law, who had also had a c-section, spent a lot of time texting me and helping me process my birth. My best friend ended up having an emergency c-section 2 weeks after me with the birth of her son and so together we walked through our experiences and supported one another. It was so helpful to have other c-section moms come alongside me and help me process my own birth.

4. What’s your #1 piece of advice/encouragement for a new c-section mom?:

Even though you and your baby are healthy, it doesn’t erase the trauma you may have experienced. Take the time to process and mourn if you need to. Through this, you will heal and begin to see the beauty and appreciate what you went through to bring your baby into this world.

5. How do you believe having a c-section birth(s) made you stronger?:

I have delivered a baby vaginally and I have delivered a baby through my belly. While both experiences were beautiful and incredible in their own way, my belly birth taught me so much about myself. It taught me that I am resilient, I am strong, I am brave, and that I would do anything for the safety of my children. Someday, I look forward to showing my daughter my scar and telling her about the way she entered this world. I hope for her it is a testament of just how much I love her.

Name: Kimberly Roe, Stay-at-Home-Mama

Country of Residence: USA

Instagram Username: @kimberlyearlene